"To sleep perchance to dream"

I see happiness everywhere. A guy accepting his girl though she already has a kid. Despite that fact they are able to smile and function as a normal family with smiles from ear to ear. People doing what they love. Staying fit, working the job they’ve always dreamed of doing, enjoying an outing with friends having nothing but a good time. It makes me happy and makes me smile at the sight of these things. It disappoints me that most people can also fail to see what they have in front of them is great. And me… There’s always something to bring me down back to this state questioning why is it that nothing seems to go my way while at times I’m having a blast with friends. Why am I not satisfied? Is it because I’m afraid to chase what it is I want, what is it I crave? Or the fact that I do nothing or scared to try and put myself in an uncomfortable position where I may fail. Life moves by too fast to recognize what’s happening in the present. One day you may be chatting with a close friend then the next day you might hear they were killed in the midst of war. It’s not the greatest feeling working a dead end job knowing you may be destined for something greater. When opportunity calls answer it. But why is it that I am scared to answer that call. I want to be happy. I want to be doing what I love and now I’m back at the start. Being lost. There’s no feeling I can describe that’s worst than that. Not knowing what it is you’re meant to do or what action to take. I’m tired of not knowing what road to take. I just want to be that piece of the puzzle finally fits and reveals the bigger picture.